Haynesworth Continues to Prove He Ain’t Worth the Hanes He Puts on Every Morning

"Look at me! I'm flying... straight off the radar as a legitimate athlete."

Washington Redskins nose-tackle Albert Haynesworth says he's surprised that he's suspended, which really isn't all that surprising in itself considering he’s acted outright shocked in the past that he has to maintain some level of physical conditioning as a professional athlete. Who knew?

Whatever Haynesworth's reaction to the news, the only surprise the general public should have, in regard to the Redskins' decision to suspend Haynesworth four games for conduct detrimental to the team on Tuesday, is why it took the team so long.

We’re talking about a player that not only couldn’t pass a conditioning test most asthmatic high-school rejects could, but one that had been late for team meetings, appeared hung-over at practice and admitted to having gone out drinking the previous night, and has refused to cooperate with the Redskins’ coaching staff for the simple reason that the team wasn’t playing a system that showcased his abilities and allowed him to actually play half-decently.

The fact that he believes he could be the best ever at his position only if he plays the way he wants to is proof that he never will. The best athletes are able to adapt to their surroundings, fit into whatever system the coaches choose. Anyone can be great at a game that they make up (BASEketball, anyone?), but it takes a truly great athlete to excel playing by someone else’s rules and to not be, shall we say, a little “female dog” about it. 

He really has been acting out like a problem child, kicking and screaming every step of the way this season, throwing a tantrum in the grocery store in order to get his mother to buy him the one brand of cereal he wants. Knowing his fitness level, it’s probably something really unhealthy like Lucky Charms, as in what he’ll need to jump-start his career again, if this latest black stain ever fades.

Admittedly quarterback Donovan McNabb has had his share of controversy dealing with the two-headed monster that is the Shanahan family, but with Haynesworth a supposed two-time All-Pro defensive lineman he really only has to deal with head-coach Mike and not offensive-coordinator Kyle. For a guy known to take joy in the small indulgences life has to offer, he sure has found it hard to take joy in the small blessings as well.

Now, lucky for him, he doesn’t have to deal with the team at all and likely won’t ever again as his days as a Redskin are clearly numbered. Good on Shanahan for putting the team first, even if this decision of his perpetuates what has been a huge embarrassment for the organization. As for Haynesworth, he may very well get traded in the off-season... that is if Washington can find another team willing to take on an oversized baby.

Washington Redskins Fans Get into It, Taking Sides in Shanahans-McNabb Feud

This from Sunday's 17-13 Minnesota Vikings' win over the Washington Redskins, during which frustrations finally boiled over among Redskins fans who realized midway through that they were indeed getting beat by a 41-year-old wannabe porn actor in Brett Favre (who has the middle name, Lorenzo, to prove it). It's safe to say neither of the two main culprits in the fight are as old as that, although one got just as embarrassed as Washington, unfortunately.

McNabb and Redskins Pull Rabbit out of Their Hat, then Lay an Egg

"That guy did it... me, I was nowhere near the field last night."

After Monday night’s disaster of a “game” between the Philadelphia Eagles and the Washington Redskins, it’s perhaps important, especially for Washingtonians, to think back to a happy place, a simpler time, mainly when they weren’t having their behinds handed to them by a would-be extra in The Longest Yard in Michael Vick.

For example, think back a few weeks when the team was actually above .500. Think back to when the idea to pull starting quarterback Donovan McNabb in the dying moments of a loss to the Detroit Lions was but a pipedream in the mind of the double-headed hydra that is the Shanahans.

Think back even to this weekend when news of a five-year, $78-million contract between the two sides had not yet been released to media outlets, had not yet caused mass-hysteria and widespread confusion within the nation’s capital. Reports actually surfaced that several city blocks had to be shut down out of fear of one, big city-wide traffic accident taking place when the news first hit, at which point countless commuters no doubt took their eyes off the road and stared blankly at their radios. Well, not really. But it’s easy to imagine.

This nonsensical development sure puts things into perspective, makes you realize not to take anything for granted, like the knowledge that the sky is blue, for example, because as sure as molecules in the air we breathe scatter the sun’s blue light more than they do its red, up until a few days ago everyone KNEW the Redskins weren’t going to re-sign McNabb when he was to become a free agent at season’s end. And then this happened. Of course, there is an out in the contract that allows the Redskins to cut ties with McNabb at the end of this year, but if exercised that would lead to just another huge public embarrassment, of which the team has suffered through many.

If the relationship between McNabb and head coach Mike Shanahan and offensive coordinator Kyle Shanahan is just peachy, which is the official party line to be toted, then fine. It’s a deal that should be lauded. As McNabb pointed out on the radio in response to Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Terrell Owens’ tweet yesterday, “how do u justify a 78 million dollar contract with this type of performance?”, the 2-7 Bengals are paying their quarterback, Carson Palmer, $118.75 million over six years. Consider it a misstep by T.O. to put down a QB, who clearly had reason to be pretty touchy after an embarrassing 59-28 loss.

When all is said and done, McNabb didn’t necessarily let his team down on Monday. Admittedly, he did throw three interceptions, but he did pass for 295 yards. Considering Michael Vick, who has gotten rave reviews for his performance, passed for 333, clearly McNabb wasn’t as horrible as Owens led people to believe. And as far as I know McNabb doesn’t play defense, meaning at least some of those 59 points the Eagles put up weren’t his fault. On any other day, 28 points should have been enough to give the Redskins a decent chance at winning, but they didn’t not just because of McNabb but because the entire team didn’t show up. All last night added up to was a bad loss (okay, a horrible loss) at a really bad time.

When all is said and done, the game was much more about Vick’s dominance, with the pivot actually moving past Steve Young into second all-time for most yards rushed by a quarterback (former Eagle Randall Cunningham is first). It even seems to be a bit of an injustice to talk about how McNabb was to blame for the loss when Vick had so much to do with his team’s victory.

As such, let Vick and the Eagles have their day. And let the Redskins get to healing after their monumental defeat. The good news is there’s no way it can get any worse than it got yesterday. Of course, the bad news is up until yesterday no one thought it could get that bad.

Maybe McNabb could take a page out of Vick’s playbook and look to him for inspiration. It’s nothing short of incredible what Vick has been able to accomplish following his 21-month stay in prison. Sixty months may seem like much longer, but there is a chance the deal works out for everyone involved. And, if not, we can all at least look forward to more squabbling between the Shanahans and McNabb from here on out.

Maybe McNabb Would Have Stayed in the Game if His Last Name Was Shanahan

"... And that's how we lost the game against the Lions!"

The obvious takeaway from the Washington Redskins employing both Mike Shanahan and his son Kyle aside, it would be unfair to assume that there is any sort of wrongdoing going on within the organization. In fact, if Shanahan is guilty of one thing, it's the furthest thing away from nepotism, as evidenced by his need to go against the grain, take out Donovan McNabb, and put in crappy back-up-quarterback Rex Grossman in the dying minutes of Sunday's 37-25 loss to the Detroit Lions.

I mean, here's a coach not going with his team's established starting quarterback, a six-time Pro Bowler, and putting in a has-been/never was (it's hard to tell with Grossman; he did lead the Chicago Bears to the Super Bowl), who played under the offensive coordinator the year before, supposedly had this great understanding of his two-minute offense to the point of never having actually run one under him during a game... one with a brutal  career win-probability-added in clutch situations of -0.93 (meaning he's been horrible when he's had to run a two-minute offense before). What's so nepotic about that? If anyone's guilty of favouritism, it's clearly that offensive coordinator. All Shanahan needs to do from here on out is do a better of job of selecting his coaching staff. Oh, wait...

Obviously, son Kyle has built up his career almost by himself and he should be given credit for accomplishing as much as he has up to this point in his career. However, the stench emanating from the move to take out McNabb late in that loss is foul to say the least.

The excuses that have come out of the Shanahans' mouths the past few days have ranged from the questionable to the idiotic. For example, the questionable: that nagging hamstring injuries have hampered McNabb's cardiovascular endurance to the point that it was necessary to put in a cold back-up QB in a high-pressure situation that led to a costly fumble. And the idiotic: that McNabb had been informed beforehand that he might be benched if he was deemed to be struggling.

McNabb was 17 for 30 for 210 yards, with one touchdown and one interception... definitely not great stats, but nothing bad enough to justify a benching that late in a game. The one stat that jumps out at you are the six times he got sacked, leading to the obvious conclusion that he was not necessarily the one to blame for his mediocre game, that the team as a whole was. And, on the off chance (the) Shanahan(s) really did think he was struggling, the time to take him out of the game would have been at any time before the Redskins lost the lead with three minutes left to play. Instead, Grossman got put in with 1:50 left.

Even questions about McNabb's work ethic have entered into the picture, with Washington reportedly becoming disenchanted with his lack of one, but the younger Shanahan has gone on record as saying that McNabb has "perfect work habits".

With former Los Angeles Raiders QB JaMarcus Russell joining the Redskins for a workout, this is clearly becoming one of the most intriguing scandals in the NFL this season, which is saying a lot considering Brett Favre's third leg is still making headlines despite his playing on only one last week.

There's also a "he said, he said" element here, with McNabb refuting ever being told that he might be taken out of the game. And what's worse for the Shanahans is that in denying it's ever happened he still seems to be  his usual self: a team player, an overall stand-up guy, and never one to want to start a ruckus. He even went so far as to say "[the] Coach makes his decisions", in declining to criticize Shanahan. Entering this season, McNabb even had kind words to say about Kyle on the radio:

Forced to choose who to believe, fans would no doubt go for the seemingly slighted, likeable all-star quarterback over the father-and-son duo that can't even seem to get their own stories straight. 

As such, it's clear that this is just the beginning. Likely the beginning of the end of McNabb's time in Washington, but a beginning nonetheless. It can only get better (or worse depending on your vantage point) from here on out.

Straight from the Horse’s Mouth

"Damn... they didn't say anything about running when they paid me $100 million."

Hearing Washington Redskins nose tackle Albert Haynesworth say “I’m not good enough”, as he did on Thursday in regard to playing his team’s 3-4 defense, is like hearing an infant say he’s not old enough to drink. Some things are just inherently obvious.

Of course, hearing an infant speaking would be akin to winning the lottery in terms of its sheer unlikelihood, but it is even more of a fitting analogy when one considers just how Haynesworth has failed to grow up and be a man. You see, extraordinarily, he’s found the perfect balance in essentially winning the lottery and behaving like a baby at the same time, refusing to take on-field responsibility for his huge contract like he should.

After signing a seven-year, $100-million deal in 2009, Haynesworth has yet to re-establish himself as a Pro-Bowl-calibre player. He last made the game in 2008, his last with the Tennessee Titans. He’s certainly come a long way, and not for the better, since being voted the league’s most dominant defender by his peers in October 2009. Admittedly, the stomping incident on Dallas Cowboys center Andre Gurode that yielded a five-game suspension in 2006 is also in the past and should stay there, but the truth of the matter is no one truly fears a man of Haynesworth’s physical conditioning, especially following the events of this past off-season.

At 6’6”, 335 pounds, Haynesworth is a big man, but, playing in a league where size most definitely counts, the one positive he can take away from his whole stint in Washington is the legions of male fans he’s won over by disproving the “bigger is better” myth. Haynesworth essentially could not pass a sprinting test in 10 days that most everyone else could do in a matter of 10 minutes, singlehandedly discrediting the term “professional athlete”... both words.

His well-documented scuffles with head coach Mike Shanahan and reluctance to embrace change to the team’s defensive make-up all make it readily apparent that Haynesworth is not a team player. When you make $100 million, you seldom are. When you turn down an opportunity to be released and play in a defensive system of your choice just for the sake of collecting a $21-million signing bonus, which he received in April, it only builds up the case further against your character, or lack thereof.

Granted, his candor is appreciated and it’s somehow admirable that he was able to acknowledge his deficiencies in front of the media on Thursday. The first step is admitting you have a problem, after all. Unfortunately, not being good enough means never being able to overcome it, if it was the least bit true. He’s proven he’s capable of being an elite athlete, yet his refusal to not play the starting role set out for him by the Redskins is childish and just goes to show that you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, if he was acting his age (29), that is.

A Week to Remember for DeAngelo Hall

Sure, everything comes back to his performance on Sunday against the Chicago Bears, but Washington Redskins cornerback DeAngelo Hall's week all culminated on Tuesday when he got named the NFC defenseive player of the week. Not too shabby for a player who's known as a defensive liability who can occasionally contribute a show-stopping clutch play. It just so happens that on Sunday he strung together four of those plays in one game to tie an NFL record with four interceptions. As a result, not only did he earn the aforementioned player-of-the-week honours, but he also had his jersey shipped off to the Pro Football Hall of Fame. So, not only does Hall get the well-deserved accolades this week, but for once he gets the chance to be remembered for something other than his volatile nature, as displayed once upon a time in his blow-up with his then-head coach of the Atlanta Falcons Bobby Petrino back in 2007.

My bad, that was actually Hall taking on Atlanta head coach Mike Smith last November... two years after  being traded to the Oakland Raiders and then signing with the Redskins. The more things change, the more they stay the same. Please don't ever change, DeAngelo.